When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Firstly of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Basic issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t any denying that sober curiosity has elevated just lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final yr in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. Immediately we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however actually not the questions on what we will do if we’re fascinated with a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we strategy consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private resolution, however should you’re any sort of an everyday drinker (which means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other method. If you happen to’re not consuming through the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her e-book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of alternative for at the very least 4 weeks provides clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely will not be potential whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you don’t have any thought how shitty you actually really feel once you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It normally takes a number of weeks to your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually is dependent upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to only see should you may make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or had been you on the lookout for actual well being advantages? Or did you notice that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is admittedly what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. If you happen to spend loads of time bargaining with your self at any time when alcohol is concerned, which ends up in loads of “guidelines” round your consuming, you would possibly wish to take a step again.

You may not even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply develop into a part of your interior chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No laborious alcohol through the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so forth.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week evening.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my consuming had been stuffed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been continuously shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down each day, and that sort of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You would possibly simply determine that it’s not price it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this considering “I don’t have an issue with my alcohol consumption however wish to take a extra conscious strategy to what I eat/drink,” what questions needs to be explored when fascinated with alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the idea that there are “downside drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and reasonable, mannequin to make use of relating to speaking about alcohol is the thought of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the thought of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The fantastic thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t have to hit any type of a all-time low earlier than you may discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to determine at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

If you happen to’re able to get sincere with the position alcohol performs in your life, I’d counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested in your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve got, and whether or not or not you need a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this state of affairs?

Tam: What if our buddies have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we are attempting to proceed. Do you could have recommendations/suggestions for learn how to make this a part of my life-style with my consuming buddies? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to seek out new buddies – haha. However, critically, if your folks actually respect and assist you within the selections you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re frequently making an attempt to push you to begin consuming once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila received’t do any hurt, you then would possibly have to rethink who you’re spending time with. You might want to work out for your self what you wish to do with the time that you’ve got, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your good friend group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – you then would possibly want to seek out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to switch that Friday evening cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m essentially the most fundamental sober individual round – and I’m pleased with consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that individuals have completely different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing a little bit extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise available on the market – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m frequently impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Complete Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to supply such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. If you happen to’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s sort of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly wish to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this yr and keep a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam